Reputation vs. Character

When I started reading my bible today I was pulled to a section called, “Look Up.” I use the daily walk Bible and there are these extra tidbits to read about what the Scriptures say. Todays was so good I thought, nothing I write could compare. Here is the devotion as it’s written regarding Job: 18-19. 

Reputation is what others think you are; character is what God knows you are. And when your reputation and character are both blameless, you have integrity-the ring of authenticity in the life of the child of God. Integrity is behaving in the dark just as you would in the light. It is being what you say you are and doing what you said you would even when no one is watching. It is consistency of character, with no hidden agenda or twisted motive. Integrity is what causes you to tell the truth, regardless of how tempting it might be to shade the truth. It’s what prompts you to tell the cashier you’ve received too much change, to give back the wallet someone lost without first counting its contents, to drive one mile under (rather than over) the speed limit, to be one minute early, rather than late, for an appointment, to stand up for what is right even if you stand alone. When Job’s world came crashing down around him, he no doubt faced an avalanche of emotional responses: fear, frustration, anger, bitterness, confusion and bewilderment. Unknown to Job, a celestial drama was unfolding between God and Satan-with Job as the center of attention. God was inviting Satan to observe one of his choicest servants and to discover what a blameless and upright man looks like-one who holds fast to his integrity. Job’s character in the crucible of adversity was so remarkable that even his wife found it unbelievable (2:9).

I loved it! I loved how this challenges me to think about my character and integrity especially when nobody’s looking. What do I want my legacy to be and what do I want people to think of me? The other great thing I loved reading was that even as there was a war going on between Satan and God that Job couldn’t see, so is there a war between God and Satan for your heart.  If you’re someone going through a terrible situation right now, think about how the “behind the scenes” may look for you. Maybe God is saying to Satan, “Look at (Insert your name here), they are one of my choicest servants.” On the opposite of this, if your life is going great and you don’t feel Satan’s attacks, maybe you want to reflect on your life and ask yourself, “Am I a threat to the Devil?” If you’re not, it’s no wonder the Devil is leaving you alone. I want to live a life full of integrity and I want the Devil to be threatened by me. Making a commitment to read Scripture daily is my step towards making those a reality.

Comforting a friend.

Do you ever feel like when a friend/family member is in times of trouble and pain, you never know the words to say? I’m not great at comforting people. I rarely show emotion and don’t ever seem to have the right words to say. I usually end up cracking a joke to lighten the mood because tension and sadness makes me uncomfortable. I had to chuckle a little when reading Job 16. Up to this point in the last few chapters his friends have been trying to convince him that his sin was at fault for all his ailments. They thought if he just asked forgives for his sin, all the bad things would stop happening to him. They said, surely he was cursed! But he wasn’t cursed and his sin wasn’t leading to all the hurt and pain. It was the devil and his attacks that were causing the hurt and pain. After his friends tried convincing him everything was happening because of his sin, Job replied in 16:1

 

“I have heard many things like these; you are miserable comforters, all of you!”

 

That would be something my friends would say to me, letting me know I’m miserable at making others feel better. I especially love vs. 4,

 

“I also could speak like you, if you were in my place; I could make fine speeches against you and shake my head at you.”

 

I think more often than not we find ourselves giving advice to people on what they should/shouldn’t do instead of just praying, listening and offering good support. I know I’m guilty of that too. I want to learn as the bible says to be quick to listen and slow to speak. I want to be wise in my words and if I’m just spewing advice without praying and listening first, my words may just be clashing symbols that don’t have weight or power behind them. I need to focus on being more like Job than his friends and I need to work on being a better comforter. Maybe that’s a lesson we can all learn.

A call to the leaders of the Church...."Are you ready to ruummmmble!!"

Recently some friends of mine found themselves angry at the Church, which unfortunately isn’t anything new especially for ministers who seem to always get burned, but this time it really struck a chord with me. The Church is filled with sinners; it’s an imperfect place because the people inside it are imperfect. However there are few who God calls to ministry. They make it their life work to serve the Lord in his house. These ministers are different than elders or deacons. Most elders/deacons are called to work outside the church and then use the Gifts they have been given to be an “overseer” of the church. The bible says in 1 Tim 3:1, “If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task.” Vs. 8 says this, “Deacons, likewise are to be men worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine and not pursuing dishonest gain.” For the ministers, the bible specifies that these men are also considered Elders but they are paid for teaching and preaching. In 1 Tim 5: 17-18, “The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says, “Do not muzzle the ox while it is treading out the grain,” and “the worker deserves his wages.”” The pastors of your churches are paid for the work they do. They are given double honor or elder and preacher/teacher and yet they are the most un-respected and mistreated group in the church! I don’t write this lightly when I say that being a pastors wife is hard, trust me, it down right stinks sometimes. A lot of that reason is because we see our husbands, the Godly men who strive to serve and live their lives preaching and teaching the word of God being treated like stray dogs. People of the church bark and bite and then use God’s name to justify their actions. Shame on you, shame on all of you.

1 Tim 4:12, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”

Yet filled inside our church buildings are, well we can call them “experienced” Christians (older individuals) who run the church based on their feelings, traditions and frankly their downright stubbornness. We run circles around these people because we don’t want to offend anyone. Well correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t remember Jesus being a people pleaser. No, he was a kingdom worker, a servant and follower of the Law and here to save the lost.

I’ve been reading Job lately and even though I’ve known the story of Job for a long time it’s just the last few days I’ve realized-I think Job and I would have gotten along well. See, Job was this amazing man of God. He knew God’s power and stood in awe of him daily. The devil told God that he could get Job to turn against God.  So God, knowing Job’s awesomeness said to the devil-go ahead and try-just don’t kill him! The devil did everything but kill him. Killed his livestock, family, gave Job sores and made his life horrible. This is where I think Job and I would get along great-see Job loved God but Job had an attitude. I love God, but anyone who knows me, knows I have an attitude (Joel would say a big one!) But God loved Job and he had a plan and even though we couldn’t see his plan we know it’s there! When Job was complaining to God, this is how God responded in Job 38, “Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it?” The Scripture goes on, but you see the point of Gods response, you weren’t there. God says, I’m the creator, I made the plans, I know the path, put your trust in me. So we as pastors lean on God, take the beatings and pursue his plans knowing full well, he’s the creator, he’s made our plans we will follow his path. I often relate myself to Jesus, not that I’m anywhere near Jesus but just that as Jesus was beaten and knocked down, cursed, stoned, spit on etc, so should we as his servants bear the Cross.

Ministers, Elders, and deacons, here is my final thought: 1 Tim says you are “to be above reproach.” The job of a minister, elder and deacon don’t have to be as hard as you’re making it. Stop bending over backwards to make others happy. Do what is right according to the Word and your job is easy! Stop people please and start Kingdom seeking.

For those of us hurt by the church, remember this: It doesn’t matter how many times we get knocked down. It only matters how many times we get back up!

Who's that hot mess?!...Oh, that's the pastor's wife!

A few months ago I was talking with someone in our church and the topic of Joel becoming a senior pastor came up. Keep in mind at this point we have no idea where God will call Joel to pastor at and are excited for the possibilities ahead. Anyhow, this person said if Joel was to succeed Mark (our current pastor) it would be difficult for the ladies in our church to adjust to me as the pastor’s wife vs. the current pastor’s wife. He didn’t mean this as anything other than to point out the very obvious difference between her and I.  It got me thinking, would they really? Our current pastor’s wife is amazing. She reminds me of the pastor’s wife from when I was growing up in the church. Always looks great, put together well, leads a Bible study/Sunday school class, is quiet, patient and graceful. She really reminds me of a proverbs 31 wife. Then there’s me. I’m blunt, outgoing, loud, rarely put together, late to everything and the thought of leading a bible study is doable but only because I’m great at procrastinating. Most Sundays I come into church late, hair thrown back, praising God for two things 1. I made it there with four kids dressed and hopefully fed and 2. Kids programming at church means I’m kid free for 3 hours! Definitely not the sounds of a proverbs 31 woman.  So why did God chose me for this job?! That’s been a question I’ve asked myself every day of my life for the last 10 years.  I guess my only answer is-God knows and I’m just going to trust him.

I got thinking about the many women I’m blessed to call friends who are also pastor’s wives and realized-I’m really not that different! The idea of the pastor’s wife is really an older idea.  Long gone are the days where we wear dresses to church, hair in buns, kids well behaved and quiet sitting in the front pew listening to me on piano.  That’s a great thing and I’m glad the image of the pastor’s wife has changed.  I don’t want to appeal to women who are already saved members of a church. I want to appeal to the lost women, sinning, hurting and searching. I want to appeal to the woman at the well. I want to make a difference in the lives of the ones who really need me.  

So I guess the final thought is wherever Joel becomes a pastor at, they better be ready for me. I’m funny, outgoing, honest, caring and loud. I may not appeal to the older women in the church and that’s okay. I just pray whomever God puts in my path can see a love for Christ and a heart for them. I pray all ladies, young and old will see the power of living as Christ made them and take pride in our differences.