Would God celebrate Veterans day?

So this topic is going to be hot-at least, I think it could be. I really welcome comments and feedback because I know people will have differing opinions, and that’s okay. I was really convicted this week about church, knowing that tomorrow (Monday) was Veterans day. It got me thinking, what does God want for our worship when an American holiday (Veterans day, Memorial day, 4^th of July) is near?  I’ve been in churches that don’t even mention the holiday, other churches that spend their whole service focused around the holiday and many in between. So my question is, what does God want for our worship?
            My dad is a military man. Since I was born he was in the service. A Navy man with great pride. He actually just retired this past March as Master Chief of the Navy Reserves (I believe that was his title). Because of his remarkable service and commitment to our country, I have become a very patriotic woman. I love this country and those who serve to protect it. I get emotional thinking about the price of freedom because I’ve seen firsthand that freedom isn’t free. From 2001 to 2002 (I may get dates off a little) he was stationed in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. After that, he was stationed in Kuwait for a year. After that tour he was stationed in Georgia for a year.  Freedom isn’t free, my dad taught me that. I’m proud of him and all he’s done not only for my family but for our country.

Like I said, I’ve been convicted of this and lately, I’ve just needed more Jesus. I don’t know how to explain it other than simply saying, I’m seeking him more. I’m trying to spend time ever day reading his Word.  I’m focusing more on talking about him with others. Spending time with my kids, showing them Gods love in action. Because of this, today for church, I needed Jesus. I needed to feel Jesus today, more than yesterday or the day before. I wanted to seek him in everything.  I may have a lot of people that will read this from my church and I pray their not upset with me when I say what I’m about to say. My church is one that, in my opinion, wraps their service (nearest Sunday to Veterans day) around Veterans. We focus our worship towards them. We cut out the songs to play videos or slideshows of vets. We recognize God and worship the veterans. I don’t agree with the way these Sundays (all Sundays nearest to the American holidays) are done. Today I visited a different church and I was surprised and slightly pleased that not once did the word Veteran come up. We started with worship. We sang powerful songs of Christ love and his promises. We raised our hands in worship. We listened as the pastor talked to us about money, of all topics. We watched a baptism and saw lives changed forever. Never once taking time to recognize any Veterans. Part of me wondered if even that was a little wrong. Maybe they could have done a quick, thank you to those who serve. Maybe they should have had any veterans stand up and we could have prayed for them. But nothing, not even a mention of the upcoming holiday-was this okay? I believe so and here’s why; Scripture doesn’t talk about corporate worship being focused on servicemen.  It just doesn’t! It doesn’t ever say to praise the Lord but put America first and I feel like when we focus our service on the holiday, that’s exactly what we’re doing.

***I don’t want there to be any confusion in my thoughts here. I think it’s okay to recognize the holiday, I just don’t want the whole service wrapped around it.***

            The Bible is packed full of stories of soldiers and war. From Joshua to Gideon, even Deborah, a woman, led a successful counterattack against the king of Canaan. God tells those who serve both their country and the Lord to be strong and courageous. Not to be afraid or terrified because the Lord your God is with you. He won’t leave you or forsake you, Deuteronomy 31:6. This isn’t a reason to change a church service to including lots of honoring people and little honoring of God. I really encourage those who are reading this to give me your thoughts. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe the Bible does talk about focusing on the holiday and I’ve missed it. Maybe I’m right and if you are a member of a church that wraps their service around a holiday, say something-change it! I think for my church change would be hard because nobody ever wants to upset the older people and that’s really unfortunate. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. God spoke boldly. He wasn’t afraid to lovingly convict people of their wrong doings. We need to get back to the point of worship. What does God want for our worship?! He wants everything! He wants us all. He wants our time and our attention. He wants our hearts and our focus. He wants our commitment.  We can’t be fully committed to God when were too busy worshiping America. I love America. I love God more. 

A day of Thankfulness

I know most people are doing a daily list of all the things their thankful for, and honestly there may be some days where I join in, just not on a consistent basis will I remember to do it. However today was different, today was a day full of times I said, “thank you God!”
           The first came this morning as I dropped all the kids off at school and had time, 1 on 1 with Nolan. He’s getting to the age where he loves to play and interact. He laughs and makes the BEST faces ever. I’m so thankful for time with him.
           Second time I was thankful came when Joel and I went to Ty’s conference today and his teacher Mrs. Akers told us what an awesome job Ty is doing! That makes three kids in school who all got outstanding reports. I’m so thankful for Ty and his outstanding efforts in school (Nevaeh and Connor’s too).

The third time I was thankful today came when I was driving to the bank and grocery store. I saw a man standing on the corner of the gas station with a cardboard sign and a gas can in hand. He obviously needed gas so I pulled into the gas station, waved him over and allowed him to fill his gas can up. I offered him a cup of coffee and sent him on his way. I’m so thankful for a husband who works hard to provide and that we have resources to get gas when we need it.

The night ended with me feeling the most thankful. I was blessed to attend my circle of mom’s meeting (great group of moms who meet monthly-if you’re interested, let me know and I’ll get you the info!). Anyhow, at my table tonight, as I sat and talked to the other moms, I discovered one mom was the mother of a child with a severe peanut allergy. We talked about the difficulties and fears that come along with a child in public schools and such severe allergies. The mom across the table kept getting interrupted by her son who later I would find out had severe diabetes and needed to have insulin and blood sugar taken/given regularly. We talked about how scary it is trusting others to care for the medical needs of our children while they are at school or other places. The mom to my right was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. She is now waiting to hear from the doctor as to radiation/treatment etc. We surrounded her tonight, laying hands on her and praying asking our heavenly father to heal our sister/friend. I’m so thankful for the health of my family. I am blessed beyond blessed to have four amazing and healthy children and that I’m healthy-other than the occasional donut overload.

            So many times today I’ve been thankful for all God has blessed me with. Anyone reading this blog has equally as many things to be thankful for, if not more. It’s how you look at life and your surroundings that show it. Find the things in your life that you are thankful for and make sure to tell them!

Reputation vs. Character

When I started reading my bible today I was pulled to a section called, “Look Up.” I use the daily walk Bible and there are these extra tidbits to read about what the Scriptures say. Todays was so good I thought, nothing I write could compare. Here is the devotion as it’s written regarding Job: 18-19. 

Reputation is what others think you are; character is what God knows you are. And when your reputation and character are both blameless, you have integrity-the ring of authenticity in the life of the child of God. Integrity is behaving in the dark just as you would in the light. It is being what you say you are and doing what you said you would even when no one is watching. It is consistency of character, with no hidden agenda or twisted motive. Integrity is what causes you to tell the truth, regardless of how tempting it might be to shade the truth. It’s what prompts you to tell the cashier you’ve received too much change, to give back the wallet someone lost without first counting its contents, to drive one mile under (rather than over) the speed limit, to be one minute early, rather than late, for an appointment, to stand up for what is right even if you stand alone. When Job’s world came crashing down around him, he no doubt faced an avalanche of emotional responses: fear, frustration, anger, bitterness, confusion and bewilderment. Unknown to Job, a celestial drama was unfolding between God and Satan-with Job as the center of attention. God was inviting Satan to observe one of his choicest servants and to discover what a blameless and upright man looks like-one who holds fast to his integrity. Job’s character in the crucible of adversity was so remarkable that even his wife found it unbelievable (2:9).

I loved it! I loved how this challenges me to think about my character and integrity especially when nobody’s looking. What do I want my legacy to be and what do I want people to think of me? The other great thing I loved reading was that even as there was a war going on between Satan and God that Job couldn’t see, so is there a war between God and Satan for your heart.  If you’re someone going through a terrible situation right now, think about how the “behind the scenes” may look for you. Maybe God is saying to Satan, “Look at (Insert your name here), they are one of my choicest servants.” On the opposite of this, if your life is going great and you don’t feel Satan’s attacks, maybe you want to reflect on your life and ask yourself, “Am I a threat to the Devil?” If you’re not, it’s no wonder the Devil is leaving you alone. I want to live a life full of integrity and I want the Devil to be threatened by me. Making a commitment to read Scripture daily is my step towards making those a reality.

Comforting a friend.

Do you ever feel like when a friend/family member is in times of trouble and pain, you never know the words to say? I’m not great at comforting people. I rarely show emotion and don’t ever seem to have the right words to say. I usually end up cracking a joke to lighten the mood because tension and sadness makes me uncomfortable. I had to chuckle a little when reading Job 16. Up to this point in the last few chapters his friends have been trying to convince him that his sin was at fault for all his ailments. They thought if he just asked forgives for his sin, all the bad things would stop happening to him. They said, surely he was cursed! But he wasn’t cursed and his sin wasn’t leading to all the hurt and pain. It was the devil and his attacks that were causing the hurt and pain. After his friends tried convincing him everything was happening because of his sin, Job replied in 16:1

 

“I have heard many things like these; you are miserable comforters, all of you!”

 

That would be something my friends would say to me, letting me know I’m miserable at making others feel better. I especially love vs. 4,

 

“I also could speak like you, if you were in my place; I could make fine speeches against you and shake my head at you.”

 

I think more often than not we find ourselves giving advice to people on what they should/shouldn’t do instead of just praying, listening and offering good support. I know I’m guilty of that too. I want to learn as the bible says to be quick to listen and slow to speak. I want to be wise in my words and if I’m just spewing advice without praying and listening first, my words may just be clashing symbols that don’t have weight or power behind them. I need to focus on being more like Job than his friends and I need to work on being a better comforter. Maybe that’s a lesson we can all learn.

A call to the leaders of the Church...."Are you ready to ruummmmble!!"

Recently some friends of mine found themselves angry at the Church, which unfortunately isn’t anything new especially for ministers who seem to always get burned, but this time it really struck a chord with me. The Church is filled with sinners; it’s an imperfect place because the people inside it are imperfect. However there are few who God calls to ministry. They make it their life work to serve the Lord in his house. These ministers are different than elders or deacons. Most elders/deacons are called to work outside the church and then use the Gifts they have been given to be an “overseer” of the church. The bible says in 1 Tim 3:1, “If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task.” Vs. 8 says this, “Deacons, likewise are to be men worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine and not pursuing dishonest gain.” For the ministers, the bible specifies that these men are also considered Elders but they are paid for teaching and preaching. In 1 Tim 5: 17-18, “The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says, “Do not muzzle the ox while it is treading out the grain,” and “the worker deserves his wages.”” The pastors of your churches are paid for the work they do. They are given double honor or elder and preacher/teacher and yet they are the most un-respected and mistreated group in the church! I don’t write this lightly when I say that being a pastors wife is hard, trust me, it down right stinks sometimes. A lot of that reason is because we see our husbands, the Godly men who strive to serve and live their lives preaching and teaching the word of God being treated like stray dogs. People of the church bark and bite and then use God’s name to justify their actions. Shame on you, shame on all of you.

1 Tim 4:12, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”

Yet filled inside our church buildings are, well we can call them “experienced” Christians (older individuals) who run the church based on their feelings, traditions and frankly their downright stubbornness. We run circles around these people because we don’t want to offend anyone. Well correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t remember Jesus being a people pleaser. No, he was a kingdom worker, a servant and follower of the Law and here to save the lost.

I’ve been reading Job lately and even though I’ve known the story of Job for a long time it’s just the last few days I’ve realized-I think Job and I would have gotten along well. See, Job was this amazing man of God. He knew God’s power and stood in awe of him daily. The devil told God that he could get Job to turn against God.  So God, knowing Job’s awesomeness said to the devil-go ahead and try-just don’t kill him! The devil did everything but kill him. Killed his livestock, family, gave Job sores and made his life horrible. This is where I think Job and I would get along great-see Job loved God but Job had an attitude. I love God, but anyone who knows me, knows I have an attitude (Joel would say a big one!) But God loved Job and he had a plan and even though we couldn’t see his plan we know it’s there! When Job was complaining to God, this is how God responded in Job 38, “Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it?” The Scripture goes on, but you see the point of Gods response, you weren’t there. God says, I’m the creator, I made the plans, I know the path, put your trust in me. So we as pastors lean on God, take the beatings and pursue his plans knowing full well, he’s the creator, he’s made our plans we will follow his path. I often relate myself to Jesus, not that I’m anywhere near Jesus but just that as Jesus was beaten and knocked down, cursed, stoned, spit on etc, so should we as his servants bear the Cross.

Ministers, Elders, and deacons, here is my final thought: 1 Tim says you are “to be above reproach.” The job of a minister, elder and deacon don’t have to be as hard as you’re making it. Stop bending over backwards to make others happy. Do what is right according to the Word and your job is easy! Stop people please and start Kingdom seeking.

For those of us hurt by the church, remember this: It doesn’t matter how many times we get knocked down. It only matters how many times we get back up!

Who's that hot mess?!...Oh, that's the pastor's wife!

A few months ago I was talking with someone in our church and the topic of Joel becoming a senior pastor came up. Keep in mind at this point we have no idea where God will call Joel to pastor at and are excited for the possibilities ahead. Anyhow, this person said if Joel was to succeed Mark (our current pastor) it would be difficult for the ladies in our church to adjust to me as the pastor’s wife vs. the current pastor’s wife. He didn’t mean this as anything other than to point out the very obvious difference between her and I.  It got me thinking, would they really? Our current pastor’s wife is amazing. She reminds me of the pastor’s wife from when I was growing up in the church. Always looks great, put together well, leads a Bible study/Sunday school class, is quiet, patient and graceful. She really reminds me of a proverbs 31 wife. Then there’s me. I’m blunt, outgoing, loud, rarely put together, late to everything and the thought of leading a bible study is doable but only because I’m great at procrastinating. Most Sundays I come into church late, hair thrown back, praising God for two things 1. I made it there with four kids dressed and hopefully fed and 2. Kids programming at church means I’m kid free for 3 hours! Definitely not the sounds of a proverbs 31 woman.  So why did God chose me for this job?! That’s been a question I’ve asked myself every day of my life for the last 10 years.  I guess my only answer is-God knows and I’m just going to trust him.

I got thinking about the many women I’m blessed to call friends who are also pastor’s wives and realized-I’m really not that different! The idea of the pastor’s wife is really an older idea.  Long gone are the days where we wear dresses to church, hair in buns, kids well behaved and quiet sitting in the front pew listening to me on piano.  That’s a great thing and I’m glad the image of the pastor’s wife has changed.  I don’t want to appeal to women who are already saved members of a church. I want to appeal to the lost women, sinning, hurting and searching. I want to appeal to the woman at the well. I want to make a difference in the lives of the ones who really need me.  

So I guess the final thought is wherever Joel becomes a pastor at, they better be ready for me. I’m funny, outgoing, honest, caring and loud. I may not appeal to the older women in the church and that’s okay. I just pray whomever God puts in my path can see a love for Christ and a heart for them. I pray all ladies, young and old will see the power of living as Christ made them and take pride in our differences.

 

 

Truth about the pastors wife: at least how I see it.

Okay, let’s be real honest here, anyone that knows me, knows I’m bold, blunt and usually speak before I think. With that being said-don’t read this if you’re easily offended however if you do read this and are offended, maybe God is speaking to your heart through my words-also known as conviction!  

When Joel came to me, early in our marriage, and said-I think God is calling me into ministry, my first reaction was….better check that call again cause I’m pretty sure it was a WRONG number!!! I wasn’t excited then and to this day I struggle asking God, why me?! At the time I wasn’t really focused on church. I loved attending but also loved going to the bars, having drinks with friends, cursing when I was mad and not feeling guilty about it. You know, the kind of Christian most are-the Sunday Christian. I soon realized Joel’s passion for the church was stronger than my fear and saying “no” to God wasn’t really an option. So we began the journey and it’s been a long road of ups and downs. 

Let me also say upfront…the good times far outweigh the bad and the lives impacted are worth every “flogging” we get. Also, these issues I’m speaking of aren’t directly related to the current church we’re serving at but all churches. I’m blessed to be friends with many pastors wives and I know these issues are universal.  

So here’s my issue and my struggle-a sneak peek into my weaknesses. Church is nothing more than a building filled with sinners. We ALL fall short, we ALL sin but when it comes to church-I don’t think Obama himself deals with more politics! There is more entitlement in a church than in my 4 year old’s preschool class! (and we all know how 4 year olds feel entitled to everything!). I’m tired of hearing things like, “my” church, “my” worship, “my” “my” “my”!! Only second to “they.”  “They” keep complaining, “They” don’t like it when… “They” “They” “They” We can’t have the color of our pews changed, “they” won’t like that! Or, you can’t play that kind of music in “my” church. So the entitled do what comes natural-they complain. They find someone who agrees with their cause and begin to sharpen their blades.

And who gets the blame, the pastors-the ones there paid to spend their day praying, reflecting and making changes direct to improve the church. Those paid to be kingdom minded-not “my” minded. So stay with me-churches hire pastors to vision cast-pastors spend time praying, seeking and impacting, make changes to grow and reach more lives only to be crucified by the entitled (Still with me?!)

A good friend and our former pastor, Ron Otto said this about Sacrifice and it has always stuck with me:

                   Sacrifice is giving up something you love for something you love more.

You may love the color of those pews-you may love the way worship was done-you may love the time in the service where you shook hands-but if you love Christ more, you’ll stop being “my” minded and allow the pastors to lead a kingdom minded church.

Specific to pastors wives, my issue is this: who do I have?! Who can I talk to?! I can’t discuss church problems with church members-that’s gossip. What about problems with my husband?! When we have problems, who can I talk to?! I Can’t talk to church people-that could risk his job. Congregation members don’t want to know their pastors have real life problems and old school pastors wives are used to hiding that. Long gone are the days where the wives wear dresses and play the piano. That stigma is gone.

Back to the church as a whole:

Joel and I try teaching Nevaeh about the time she takes looking in the mirror. We got great advice from our friend Tricia who also does this with her daughters. We tell our children when they take time looking in the mirror at themselves they aren’t looking outward at people around them in need. This goes for people in the church too. As a church body, we spend so much time fighing with each other we forget to look around. We want our church to grow but not at the expense of change. We have a handful of Christians who come every Sunday (and usually only Sundays) who don’t like something that happened in the service (music, announcement, changing of stage etc) and feel entitled to complain. How dare they change, “my” service. Worse yet is when leaders back into corners afraid of hurting peoples feelings. When did God or Jesus back down from something they knew was right because they were afraid of hurting peoples feelings?! Wasn’t it Jesus who went into the temple courts and turned over the tables!? When people in the church were acting like fools, he told them! Sure he used words a lot nicer than I would but he didn’t back down. He was bold, blunt and took action.

Scripture tells us to “be alert”, “resist the enemy” (1Peter 5:8,9) be on your guard and “stand against the schemes of the devil”. (Ephesians 6:11) So when irritation strikes … know immediately who your opponent is … know immediately he has schemes and plans in place that will at best steal from you and at worst destroy God’s people and their effectiveness.

Another problem I see overwhelming is Pride. A great article titled, The Hurting Church: Why we get hurt and hurt others, said this about Pride,

“God resists, or opposes, the proud but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6) Pride is a killer. It is one of the subtlest tools of the enemy. God actually resists the proud! Who would want to be opposed by God! Yet in the church we often do find pride, but it wears a different cloak than it does out in the world.

I pray for our church that Joel and I are blessed to serve at. It has its ups and downs-right now we need more prayer than usual but God is faithful in good times and bad. Joel has a gift for seeing vision in a church. He’s passionate about the church. I love that about him. Truth is, there are still days when I think-just give it up! Many days I wish I could go back to being a Sunday Christian and not working in ministry but as I said earlier, every impacted life is worth every “flogging” we take. I’m sure all in ministry would agree-it takes a special person to be ran through the ringer each and every week-to be criticized and hurt. A special person-like Jesus who took so much more than these little complaints. Truly it’s an honor to suffer a little for the one who suffered it all.

Here we go!

Well this is my first attempt at blogging. I know I won't be consistent but at least now and then I can come here and jot down my thoughts/feelings and funny stories from my husband, kids and life. Tonight we started our VBS. I have always enjoyed volunteering for our VBS and leading the kids in worship. I love seeing the little kids dance and jump and get so excited to sing about Jesus. I love all the people that help point my children to Jesus.

So as I said, I'm going to try and blog as often as I can. Hopefully on a regular basis though!

Hailee